Netflix wants $26.99 a month to rewatch The Office in 4K

$26.99 a month. Netflix is officially charging “my phone bill” money so you can scroll for 40 minutes, rewatch the same three comfort shows, and fall asleep with the menu music playing like a lullaby for the financially exploited.

They just raised prices again: Standard is now $19.99/month and Premium is $26.99/month. That’s not “a little more.” That’s “we noticed you stopped going outside and decided to invoice you for it.”

Netflix will frame this as improving the experience, investing in content, blah blah.

The funny part is the product didn’t level up with the price. The interface still feels like a slot machine designed by someone who hates you. “Because you watched one cooking show, here are 73 true-crime documentaries about cannibals.”

Who benefits? Netflix, obviously. Wall Street loves a good “we raised prices and people stayed” story. Executives get to present the earnings call like it’s a hostage negotiation they successfully concluded.

Who gets cooked? Millions of normal people who didn’t sign up for an annual tradition of “surprise, your bill is higher” for the privilege of watching content that disappears the moment you finally hit play.