Cuomo Got Canceled and Decided NYC Mayor Sounds Fun Anyway

Andrew Cuomo resigned as New York’s governor after multiple women accused him of sexual harassment, and now he’s running for mayor of New York City like the last few years were just a weird pop-up ad you can close.

This is the same Cuomo who left office in 2021 after an investigation found he sexually harassed 11 women and his administration was accused of underreporting nursing home COVID deaths. Now he’s back, auditioning to manage an 8-million-person chaos simulator where the subway is a mood disorder and trash pickup is performance art.

His pitch will be the classic Greatest Hits album: “experienced leadership,” “getting things done,” “tough but effective.”

Meanwhile the average New Yorker is playing financial Jenga with rent, daycare, MetroCards, and a bodega sandwich that costs like it comes with a timeshare. The political class is over here treating City Hall like a podcast studio: say something awful, vanish for a bit, then come back with a rebrand and a suit that fits better.

And don’t worry, everybody will pretend this is about “moving forward” and “letting voters decide.”

The real gag is that the office Cuomo wants is basically the mayor of “please don’t collapse” — policing, housing, schools, sanitation, budgets — the stuff that hits you in the face daily, not on cable news.